I'm An Introverted Nerd

I've come to realize I'm hypersensitive. An overzealous psychiatrist might diagnose a mild combination of autism, OCD, etc. But I prefer to think of myself simply as an introverted nerd. And this is actually pretty cool.

In her book Quiet, Susan Cain ponders the contours and benefits of introversion. When I read it years ago, I quickly identified myself as a learned extrovert but found the rest only vaguely applicable. Now I'm fitting more data to Kagan's balloon-popping theory, and I'd label myself high-reactive today.

I may not have been an extreme case as a child. Curiosity likely overpowered any shyness. I've always had ambitious tendencies, specifically an inclination towards agency and an existentially moral outlook. I was one of those kids raising his hand every few minutes and often impatiently blurting "but why?"

Back then, and even continuing now on this blog, I've always been compelled to inspect the structure of things. I intuitively wanted to develop my own lens to view and understand reality. It turns out we're all philosophers, revealing our axioms in our actions. Some are just more anal (or...mathematical) about this than others.

Such folks might best be described as "nerds", or people who obsess about particular topics. Is nerdiness inborn or can it be cultivated? There's probably a combination of factors, as with introversion. The more glamorous way to frame nerdy obsession would be "passion" which people seem to believe can be "found".

Cal Newport gives everyone practical tips to deliberately embrace nerd life. His reformulation of Flow as Deep Work was a monumentally important accomplishment. He rightly claimed "deep work is like a superpower in our current economy." Read the book to cultivate your superpowers.

If 2025 is the year of AI, for me personally it is also the year of my generation coming to power as triumphant nerds. At least 6 MIT classmates, friends, and former colleagues have attained mainstream billionaire-level recognition this year. I'm not the only one nerding out about this.

As I experienced discussing posters at NeurIPS, the biggest hurdle for nerds is that they get lost in technicalities. They have trouble explaining or applying concepts at the right level of abstraction. To be successful as a nerd, you have to make your ideas publicly legible and disentangle today's utility from tomorrow's theory.

I'm very happy for my friends' success, and I'm truly grateful for the inspiration I can derive from them. Even if they're too busy to talk regularly, following their journeys and knowing their stories personally helps me to calibrate and set my own bar. It's clear what zLevel 6 to 7 entails, just 3-4 more zeros in my bank account!

After moving on from Shuffle in July and focusing on my own ideas since August, I've really enjoyed my journey inward. This exploration has revealed a lot about the world. I've come to many useful new conclusions—even if some of these turn out to be obvious nerd failures (see yesterday's brand vs process post which discussed how my bank account has been going in the wrong direction).

As I continue to re-think about the role of money in my life mission, I'd also like to remind myself how necessary and freeing it has been to minimize distractions. I should be more mindful of how my hardship and schlep tolerance work against me at times, when I push myself to socialize, take unnecessary risks, or otherwise don't allow myself to embrace my natural state of being.

I require disciplined limitation of inputs to properly ease into flow. Providing myself many hours—and even days—to exist in silence is perhaps the best way for me to live. When done properly, I find myself steeping in my ambition and energized anew.

I enjoy deep work. I love sculpting ideas.

I'm looking forward to a more peaceful and productive 2026.